Every year many marriages take place in US where one receives not only a new life partner, but also an existing child or children.
In some cases, both the people entering a matrimonial bond might be having children from an earlier marriage.
In such cases, one looks forward not only to a new life with one’s spouse but also with the step children.
It’s a tricky situation to gain the confidence of step children. However, it is not unattainable.
But make sure that you are ready to face the trail and tribulations of being a good parent to a step child. Then only the matter can be handled well. Here are some tips to follow:
Build a rapport
Always try to creating a bonding with the step child prior to becoming his/her official step parent. Provide as much importance to the children as you give to your relationship with your future spouse.
Try to be friendly with them. Try to know what they like or dislike. For example, if the child likes to read, then you should try to getÂ his/her favorite books and authors. Buy your future step children little gifts of their liking.
Besides this, plan outings together to their favorite locations. Make sure that you do not neglect them when you are with your spouse.
Dealing with step-children’s jealousy
If your spouse has been a single parent earlier, then it is natural that his/her child might feel jealous of you. This is mainly because earlier, they had the full attention of their parent.
But after you join into the family, you share that space with him. Therefore, they might appear slightly irritable or resistant initially. These are the points where one must control one’s temper at all costs.
Make sure that you do not speak harsh words to the child or get angry with him/her. It will only further incense negative feelings in one’s step child’s heart.
Try and be understanding with the children. Try to find some time and have a heart to heart talk with them. Try to discuss and understand their insecurity and problems. Assure them that you are there to help and care for them.
All these processes take time, but in the long they play a significant role in cementing your bond with a step child.
If there is a situation where you and your spouse both have kids from a previous relationship; then the situation requires careful handling.
In such cases, both you and your spouse have to be careful that your children do not feel side-tracked at any point. You both have to be equally affectionate and understanding to your own as well as your partner’s kid.
All these measures ensure that with time a healthy bond develops between you and your step child.