How to keep professional jealousy at bay in a marriage

prof-jealousy1 Have you ever felt your ears redden when your wife announces with a jubilant smile that she’s got promotion at work? Does that uneasiness within you escalate on knowing that her increment amount crosses over your monthly pay?

If yes, then it’s a very common syndrome called professional jealousy that you are facing. And if it is not handled at an early stage, it can ruin even the most perfect relationships.

It is a complex problem to deal with. But with a little bit of thoughtfulness the worst can be avoided.

Separate personal and professional

There is nothing abnormal about talking to one’s spouse about one’s professional achievements. But in case the two of you are not on an equal plane when it comes to a successful career; it is best to keep your office away from home.

Mention about your major achievements and note the attitude your partner displays. Try not to sound too boastful so that your partner feels belittled or insecure in any manner.

Most importantly, never strike a comparison between your and your partner’s accomplishments. Avert from phrases like –“did you get such a huge increment when you were at the same stage?” or “Have you ever received such an appreciation for your work?”

One must understand that sometimes jealousy is rooted in anxiety or fear. If your partner is going through a bad phase at work, try your best to comfort him/her. It is essential to realize that at that point, screaming about one’s achievements can make one’s spouse edgier.

Try to keep your trust intact

Show your faith and trust to your partner all the time. There are no replacements for a few words of comfort and affection.

Intentionally or unconsciously, avoid sounding condescending after a recent promotion or other such success. One’s spouse can feel helpless or cornered under such circumstances.

Show your appreciation for your partner in every little way you can. But do not sound phony or artificial in your attempts. Try to remind your partner of the best moments you both have shared.

In case nothing seems to be going right, one can always avail the advice of an expert marriage counselor.

Try to keep words like ‘separation’ and ‘divorce’ at bay when the situation is complicated. Remember, a bit of care can save the most precious relationship of your life.